Mother of two waiting on a transplant

A young Jacksonville Beach mother is hoping for a new lease on life.
Jessica Conkey, 27, suffers from kidney disease and must undergo grueling dialysis treatments while she awaits a donor. With husband, Jeremiah, and two little girls, the family recently relocated to Jacksonville Beach from their home in New Hampshire to be closer to the Mayo Clinic where she is on the transplant list.
It’s a challenge to keep up with daughters Joanna, 5, and Evie, who turns 2 in December, while receiving dialysis that leaves her tired and weak. Joanna attends Atlantic Beach Elementary School and Conkey must get her to the bus at 6:45 a.m. She spends her days caring for Evie while her husband works in construction to provide for the family.
“I try to take it one step at a time and just breathe," she said. "I have a lot of faith so that gets me through. It kind of pushes me to have more faith, I think, because things get harder and harder. This has sort of spiraled out of control, but as long as I can hang on to that, I get through. I’ve been surrounded by some really great people lately, so I’m happy about the community that I’m in. They’ve been so supportive.”
Diagnosed with kidney disease in 2015, Conkey needs the support while she waits for a donor. Doctors told her the average wait time for patients like her with her O-Negative blood type is five years for a deceased donor. She is hoping to find a matching live donor to lessen the wait and improve the long-term success of the transplant.
“If a live donor is matched and is accepted, they give you the transplant right away,” she said. “You have a better chance with a living donor so that’s what I was hoping for. It’s a long process and it’s a lot to ask of someone. It’s not like borrowing their car or something.”
Growing up, Conkey was always on the go. She fixed cars, raced dirt bikes and worked as a sternman on lobster boats in Maine until her body forced her to slow down.
“There was nothing I couldn’t do so it’s been extra hard. It takes a lot away,” said Conkey, who is missing out on the experiences she had planned to share with her girls.
“I always thought when I had kids that I would teach them these things and be able to bring them to do all kinds of things and you just can’t. It’s impossible because you don’t have the energy. I never wanted them to see me in a weak way. I do my best to be strong so they don’t realize anything is up.”
She started out on Peritoneal dialysis which she administered to herself overnight. The process in which the inside lining of the patient’s stomach acts as a natural filter was grueling and required a weeklong training to learn how to properly provide her own care.
After relocating to Jacksonville Beach, Conkey sought treatment at another clinic before she was approved at Mayo. Her treatment schedule was disrupted and she suffered her first seizure during a routine blood draw as a result.
“That was my first ambulance trip. I’ve only been here for eight months but I think I’ve had eight ambulance trips,” she said. “After I was in the hospital for the seven days, they switched me to Hemo (dialysis) which I have to go to the [Mayo] for. So now it’s three times a week that I go.”
Hemodialysis is a blood exchange. In hemodialysis, blood is pumped out of the body to an artificial kidney machine and returned to the body through tubes that connect the patient to the machine.
Adjusting to her new dialysis schedule has presented a new set of challenges. The four-hour treatments leave her feeling tired and weak. She’s also experienced severe hypertension during the last hour of her treatment and doctors are trying to adjust her treatment plan.
She was recently hospitalized for seven days and a neighbor stepped in to help care for the girls until her husband could make it back to Jacksonville Beach. Her new regimen began immediately, not giving her any time to make child care arrangements for her youngest daughter.
The family is planning to move to a new rental closer to Joanna’s school, but first they must address a financial penalty for breaking the lease at their current home. According to Conkey, the fee is the equivalent of two months’ rent – close to $5,000 – that the family needs to cover such expenses as child care while she receives dialysis. She was once refused treatment for bringing Evie with her when she’s didn’t have anyone else to care for her.
"They said, ‘We can’t treat you with your daughter here.’ The social worker came out and said, 'I’m sorry but this has never happened before.’ I felt so bad … I had to get my dialysis,” she said. “I started frantically calling everyone I knew, even if it was someone I’d just met once at church.”
The wife of her church music director was able to pick up Evie that day, but she still needs reliable care while her dialysis continues every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Her husband is usually able to be home on the weekends but occasionally must travel for his job.
“It’s been tough just living day to day and wondering who is going to watch Evie while I go to treatment and knowing I have to find someone before that day comes. It’s not even that I just medically need to go to treatment. There’s actually a non-compliance policy with transplant patients where if you don’t do exactly what the doctors prescribe to you, you can actually be taken down from the list.”
Despite it all, Conkey said she still manages to find the good in her situation. “I guess it’s good as it can be."
A Go Fund Me page has been established to help the family at www.gofundme/jessicasfight.